“It was this completely calming feeling.
I knew at once that I was a mother and we were a family.”
—Patrice Dado, adoptive parent

As they built their family, Joe and Patrice Dado experienced the adoption process at both ends of the spectrum—from the “closed” process favored in the past to the “open” process often advocated today. Through the efforts of adoption specialist Barb Burlingham, however, the Dados, their adopted children, and both birthmothers are now one big happy family.

In the beginning, Joe and Patrice were matched with expectant mother Mary M. in what was intended to be a closed adoption: the Dados would be given only the most relevant medical information about their adopted child and no identifying information about his or her parents.

But because adoption practices were changing from closed to open, Barb offered to serve as intermediary in the event that the Dados and Mary M. decided to maintain contact after the adoption. Mary M. gave birth to Tina, and the Dados had begun their family.

Six months later, Joe and Patrice were approached about the possibility of an open adoption by Mary B., another mom-to-be. Throughout the pregnancy, Mary B. and the Dados got to know each other. After Mary B. gave birth to the Dados’ second daughter, Jennifer, the Dados shared all of Jennifer’s developmental “milestones” with Mary B. Since the Dados had such a positive open-adoption experience with Jennifer, they asked Barb Burlingham to invite Tina’s birthmother, Mary M., to become part of their family circle as well.

Tina and Jennifer have shared numerous holidays and vacations with their birthmothers, as well as countless phone calls and e-mails. (Jennifer also enjoys a relationship with her birthfather.) The Dados have included the girls’ birth relatives in First Communion and Confirmation ceremonies as well as various concerts and 4-H fairs.

Barb has been to several of the extended-family events, too, and has witnessed the benefits of the open relationships. “Secrets are usually associated with shame,” says Barb, “and the adoptee can take that on. During those teenage years, when each of us is figuring out our identity, adopted children also need to figure out who they might have been, where they came from originally. All of this information is available to the child of an open adoption. Knowing this helps the child form a total identity and increases self-esteem.”

Catholic Charities has assisted in thousands of adoptions over the years. In fact, as Patrice puts it, “Barb has made more people moms and dads than anyone you’ll meet.”

“Adoptive couples who are available to an open adoption
are the cream of the crop. They must have empathy
for the birthparents, flexibility, and the ability
not to see their child as a possession.”

—Barb Burlingham, Catholic Charities Adoption Services specialist

"It takes a village to raise a child," wouldn't you agree? This ancient African proverb has been used by many to convey the message that raising a child is such a great responsibility that it cannot be left only to parents. This same proverb has even greater relevance to those children involved in the child welfare system as they must rely on those other than their parents to raise them while their parents work to improve their own situations.

In the United States there are approximately 510,000 children in foster care. While placed in care, these children wait for reunification, and, if that's not possible, another type of permanency must be pursued. In the meantime, these children may stay with foster families or relatives who have generously opened their homes and their hearts to these children.

So who supports the foster parents and relative-care providers? Within this area, our "village"—the community—does! For the past 12 years Catholic Charities has trained and supported these providers, who are licensed through their local county's Department of Child Services. And we've been blessed with many community members and agencies that have graciously assisted in this process by providing free training sites, services, and material items. These agencies include various churches, libraries, hospitals, developers, and mental health agencies.

Along with support there must be training. It's extremely important for care providers to become and remain educated on topics related to children, their care, and the challenges they may be facing. Throughout the last decade many professionals within the community—such as attorneys, special education advocates, mental health providers, and law enforcement officers—have generously donated their time to present programs that address these topics.

Those of us in the Foster, Adoptive, Kinship Training program (FAKT) couldn't do what we do without the willingness of the community to recognize the need and be active in supporting our families who strive to make things a little better for the children in "our village."

Ask yourself:

• Do you have knowledge in an area that could benefit those involved in fostering and adopting, and would you be willing to share that knowledge?

• Do you have a facility willing to donate training space?

• Do you have items to donate to the foster children and families that provide care for them?

• Would you be willing to be a foster parent?

• Would you be willing to consider adopting a child?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, contact Robin Springstead at (260) 422-5625, ext. 223. She will assist you in discovering how you can be an active member of "our village."

“I do this from my heart. Every child deserves to have a loving home and a positive role model in his or her life. Sometimes it’s pretty tight financially, but we make it by the grace of God.”
— Irene Brewer, kinship care client

Irene Brewer, or “Granny Reenie” as she’s often called, recently earned an Angels in Adoption award, an accolade presented annually by the Congressional Coalition on Adoption Institute. She was nominated for the award by U.S. Rep. Mark Souder.

Over the last dozen years, Irene has welcomed 17 foster kids into her home. And as the award would suggest, she’s adopted five of those children, including grandnephew Demaury, 12; grandnieces Dashyia, 11; Destinie, 9; and Danisha, 7; and Myresha, 7, who’s not related by birth.

Irene began foster parenting when a family member was going through a rough personal patch and needed a foster home for her son. “I’m very proud of my family—we’ve always taken care of one another,” Irene says. “Becoming a foster parent had been in the back of my mind, but when someone in my family needed a home for her son, it had to be divine intervention that I was there to help.”

Of course, as much as Irene hates to say goodbye to any of the foster children placed in her home, she can’t adopt them all. “You get so close to the children, and you don’t want them to be traumatized by having to go somewhere else,” Irene explains. “But it makes you feel good when you know they’re going on to a home where they’ll be treated well.”

Irene’s wonderful weakness for kids needing forever homes has rubbed off on her daughter Dawn and niece Sandy. Dawn has adopted a daughter, while Sandy has adopted three girls.

Pregnancy Services - ECHO (Education Creates Hope & Opportunity)

“The people with ECHO are a real blessing
to girls who really need them.”
— Breanne, ECHO participant

It’s an unsettling statistic: without outside guidance, less than 50 percent of girls who give birth while they’re still high school students fail to graduate. In many cases, this lack of education can pull both mother and child into a cycle of poverty.

Breanne was just a sophomore at Northrop High School in Fort Wayne when she gave birth to her daughter, Trinity. With a stick-to-it attitude and the help of a supportive family and ECHO (Education Creates Hope and Opportunity) caseworkers, however, Breanne not only finished high school, but she’s also building a better life for Trinity and herself by getting a college education.

As are all ECHO clients, Breanne had access to a wide variety of services that address everything from immediate issues, such as healthcare needs, to long-term goals, such as continuing her education. She received counseling and was familiarized with available community resources. In short, ECHO provided life skills that last a lifetime.

Breanne returned to Northrop for final exams just three weeks after giving birth. With her mother to watch Trinity, Breanne completed her last two years of high school, took several general-education courses at Ivy Tech, and is now enrolled in the business-administration program at Indiana University-Purdue University Indianapolis (IUPUI).

Balancing school and motherhood can be tough, but the future is bright for Breanne and Trinity, now 3 years old. “It’s a lot of hard work, but it’s definitely worth it,” Breanne says.

brief services

“Everybody in our house goes to church, so were asking ourselves,
'Why is this happening to us?' We were out of answers,
and Catholic Charities was a blessing.”
— Paula Johnson, Brief Services client

Paula Johnson and her children—twins Shiqualla and Shiquilla, Franklin, and Damion—were looking for a fresh start when they moved to Fort Wayne in September 2005. Although Paula found work as a certified nursing assistant, there wasn’t enough money to feed four growing kids, let alone provide for any amenities.

Steadily growing gas bills, one for $700, were the last straw. Paula couldn’t keep up, and the gas was shut off, leaving the family with no heat, no hot water, and no gas for cooking. In such situations, children may be removed from a home.

Paula contacted Brief Services, which referred her to Gift of Warmth, a program that helps people who have fallen into arrears and face gas disconnection or have already been disconnected. Catholic Charities pays one-half of the outstanding bill, while the Northern Indiana Public Service Company (NIPSCO) pays the remainder.

With the most urgent need satisfied, Paula and Brief Services case manager Phyllis Mizer began investigating longer-term solutions. Additional education that would result in greater rewards seemed like a good choice. Paula was directed toward available financial-aid, and she’s now enrolled at Brown Mackie College, studying to become a licensed practical nurse.

“We’re thanking God, and we’re thanking Phyllis,” Paula says. “Phyllis has always been there with encouragement. She told me everything was going to be all right, and that made me feel better. She gave me a better outlook on life. She said things like this happen and told me to take it one day at a time.”

“We were together again, but we didn't have much more
than the clothes on our backs, and we really needed help.”
— Arleen Robertson, Brief Services client

Arleen Robertson was referred to Brief Services during a resource fair for people displaced by Hurricane Katrina. The fair, hosted by the Fort Wayne mayor’s office, brought together several agencies and organizations ready to assist.

On August 23, 2005, Arleen left New Orleans to visit her son David and his family in Fort Wayne. She left daughter India, 15, and son Kileon, 20, in the care of her mother, Helen Collins, and her sister Barbara Blanchard. On August 30, Katrina hit the Crescent City, and Arleen’s loved ones were trapped by the flooding that reached the top story of their duplex.

India and Kileon waited two days before they were rescued by helicopter; Helen and Barbara waited an additional two days before being taken out by boat. It took another six weeks before all the family members were finally reunited in Fort Wayne, thanks to travel funds provided by The Chapel and Fellowship Missionary Church.

Although the family was able to find an affordable home, there wasn’t a stick of furniture. Brief Services case manager Phyllis Mizer and her husband, George, a part-time Catholic Charities employee, located beds and a dresser. Brief Services also made sure India and Kileon were enrolled in school and gave the family a debit card to buy new clothes.

“The people at Catholic Charities were really helpful—we appreciate everything they did for us,” Arleen says. “[Catholic Charities Assistant Director] Lisa Young and Phyllis checked in on us regularly to see if we had everything we needed."

“Resettling refugees provides an extraordinary opportunity for countless
Americans to take an active part in offering a caring and supportive
environment for the refugees as they begin new lives.”
— Nyein Chan, refugee resettlement director

Nyein Chan’s firsthand experiences as a displaced person, freedom fighter, political prisoner, and eventual émigré have made him a knowledgeable, empathetic leader in Catholic Charities’ refugee-resettlement efforts.

Over the last six years, first as a caseworker and now as refugee resettlement director, Nyein has helped nearly 1,000 refugees from around the world start new lives in this diocese. About one-third of those refugees are from Nyein’s native Burma. Fort Wayne is now home to around 2,000 Burmese refugees, the largest community of its kind in the United States.

“Many of my countrymen arriving here as refugees have indeed sacrificed,” Nyein says. “They’ve lost their homes, livelihoods, possessions, families, friends, and country. They deserve better lives. It’s my greatest satisfaction that they’re enjoying better lives somehow from my assistance. I hope they all can be reunited with their families someday.”

Catholic Charities’ resettlement efforts entail a wide range of services that include securing housing and employment and providing a comprehensive orientation to life in the United States and available governmental, health, and educational services.

“I’m assisting refugees, including Burmese, in their adjustment and achieving wonderful lives in their new country,” Nyein says. “That makes me feel as though I’m living in my native country.”

“We are just very happy to be here.
Here is freedom—the land of opportunity.”
— Abdirizak Farhan, Somali Bantu refugee

Abdirizak Farhan and his family are among the hundreds of refugees Catholic Charities has helped begin new lives in this diocese over the past few years. These refugees come from a variety of places, most notably Southeast Asia, Africa, and former Soviet satellite countries. While they come from cultures that differ greatly, these refugees share a common goal—a prosperous life free of war, oppression, injustice, and fear.

The Farhans, for instance, are Somali Bantu, an ethnic minority long persecuted by the ruling-majority Somali Somalis. Abdirizak is originally from Jamaame, a small city resting on the equator in southern Somalia, where the Bantu were once responsible for much of the nation’s farming.

The fall of Somali dictator Siyaad Barre in 1991 resulted in a power vacuum and civil war. As farmers, the Bantu had large stocks of food. As an unarmed minority, they became easy targets for robbery, extortion—and even extinction—when the country’s food supply began to wane. In 1992, the Bantu began to flee and assemble in refugee camps on Kenya’s frontier bordering Somalia.

Among the lucky ones, the Farhans are thriving in their new country since arriving in the United States in 2004. Abdirizak is working as a machine operator, while wife Khadija, whom he met in a refugee camp, has her hands full with their five children.

Before civil war broke out, Abdirizak was a topnotch mechanic working on high-end vehicles, and in a refugee camp, he taught Braille and sign language. His dream is to earn a university degree and teach special-education classes.

“The day I stepped on American soil, I said,
‘Now, we are free. Here, I feel like I have freedom,
and there are jobs and education for our children.”
— Min Thein, Burmese refugee

Min Thein, a native of the small town of Zeawaddy in the Pegu Division of Burma, was among thousands of students who left their homes in the late 1980s and early ’90s to wage guerrilla warfare against the ruling military junta. Min eventually found himself in a refugee camp in Thailand, where he met his wife, Aye. After nearly three years in a United Nations High Commission for Refugees camp, the Theins got the good news that they were being resettled in the United States.

The Theins had already heard about Fort Wayne’s growing Burmese refugee community—the largest of its kind outside of Asia—before they arrived here in 2001. Although the Burmese community provides a wonderful support system for newcomers, all refugees assisted by Catholic Charities receive the same services.

Min is currently a machine operator, while Aye is a sewing machine operator. Through their hard work, the Theins have now realized a somewhat dubious American dream—paying the mortgage that goes with the house they’ve bought.

“I am very grateful for my new life here,
so I think it is important to help my fellow refugees.”
— Myint Swe, Burmese refugee

Since arriving in Fort Wayne last April with his wife and young daughter, Myint Swe has taken the initiative to become completely self-sufficient.

Because of a seizure disorder, the result of torture he endured in the Burmese prison system, Myint is unable to drive. However, immediately after arriving, he taught himself how to use the local Citilink bus system. Although he spoke little English at first, Myint is now able to travel almost anywhere within the Fort Wayne city limits using just the Citilink map and a phone book.

Myint also demonstrates a very comprehensive understanding of the social services system in the United States. When he suffered a seizure recently while waiting for the bus, he immediately informed the paramedics on the way to the hospital to contact his Supplemental Security Income (SSI) caseworker in Indianapolis, so that the paperwork for his disability benefits could be sped up.

As an aid to the other Burmese refugees in the Fort Wayne area, Myint created a list of all of the places that they may need to go, along with the addresses to those locations in both English and Burmese. Myint has also become a valuable volunteer for Catholic Charities, conducting bus training sessions for newly arrived refugees and even offering his time to give Burmese language lessons to staff members.

"I am very grateful for my new life here, so I think it is important to help my fellow refugees," says Myint, who recently began taking classes at a local community college.

“It was so important for us to comprehend everything my father's doctors
were saying and the entire health-care process, and we're very grateful for all
the assistance from Corina and Catholic Charities. Of course, I have something even
greater to be thankful for—I still have my father.”
— Carmen Regalado

An important part of dealing with any health problem is to fully understand the nature of the problem and how it can treated. That's certainly been true for Loreto Regalado and his daughter Carmen.

Natives of Mexico, neither Loreto nor Carmen speak English. So, it would have been especially difficult for 66-year-old Loreto to understand his doctors as they diagnosed and treated his heart disease and other health problems. Difficult for Carmen, too, because she must follow doctors' instructions as she cares for her father, who recently had a pacemaker implanted and is awaiting additional surgery.

However, with the help of Corina Hurtado, Hispanic medical advocate at Catholic Charities, both Loreto and Carmen have a much better understanding of Loreto's condition and his doctors' prognoses and recommended treatments and lifestyle changes.

Corina provides translations of vital medical information for Spanish-speaking clients who need assistance with English. She also helps clients as they fill out necessary forms, and she ensures that clients are able to attend essential appointments.

Both Loreto and Carmen say they're very appreciative of the help they've received, but Carmen has a very special reason to be thankful. "It was so important for us to comprehend everything my father's doctors were saying and the entire health-care process, and we're very grateful for all the assistance from Corina and Catholic Charities," Carmen says. "Of course, I have something even greater to be thankful for—I still have my father."

Senior AIDES program

“I would never have thought to look at a nonprofit
agency for a job. This is a great program. It gives you
a chance to regain your skills and learn new ones.”
— JoAnne Machowiak, Senior AIDES participant

JoAnne Machowiak had been retired for a year when she decided she needed something to do. But at 71 years of age, she wasn’t sure who would hire her or where she could turn. Then a friend told her about the Senior AIDES program administered through Catholic Charities’ South Bend office.

The AIDES program helped to point JoAnne in the right direction. She began her community-service job working part-time at the American Red Cross and soon became a valuable employee. Just as she was reaching her two-year limit with the AIDES program, JoAnne was offered full-time, permanent employment as assistant to the director of emergency services at the Red Cross.

“My job is very interesting,” she says. “It’s fascinating to see how people reach out to help others.”

JoAnne appreciates the in-service programs that Catholic Charities offers Senior AIDES about every three months. “They come in and give a presentation on subjects like how to become a better employee,” she says.

Initially, JoAnne hadn’t been sure whether she wanted to work full-time or part-time, but she now enjoys the steady income—and the activities the money affords her.

“The advantage for me is that I got exactly what I wanted.
I enjoy meeting the people who come in to the
Madison Center, and I work with a great staff.”
— Sherrall Stamatovich, Senior AIDES participant

Sherrall Stamatovich hadn’t been employed outside her home for several years. She had helped care for her grandchildren, but once they got old enough to go off to school, she was anxious to find work. “I was ready for a new challenge,” Sherrall says. “I went to Catholic Charities and enrolled in the program.”

Sherrall began her community-service job at Community Coordinated Child Care, a referral agency for daycare services. She also completed a Microsoft Excel course at the Leighton Center for Senior Health, a facility run by Memorial Hospital in South Bend. After nine months at the childcare center, Sherrall decided she’d try something new and found part-time work with Catholic Charities as a job developer.

Because of her recent work experience through the Senior AIDES program, Sherrall was prepared for permanent employment when a receptionist position came open at the Madison Center. She applied and was hired as a regular employee at the mental-health organization.

As the friendly face at the reception desk, Sherrall greets visitors, answers the phone, takes care of patient charts, and handles other office tasks.

Sherrall now has her own computer and feels she’s keeping up not only with the 21st century, but also with her 6- and 9-year-old grandchildren. And, she’s grateful that the job helps her remain self-supporting.

RSVP

“I can’t just sit around. I love meeting people;
I love talking to people. This is a great way to keep busy.”
— Everett Reinoehl, RSVP volunteer

Visit the Kruse War Memorial Museum in Auburn on a Tuesday or Thursday, and the first person you come across might just be Everett Reinoehl, greeting you, taking your tickets, giving directions, and filling you in on future plans for the museum. “I love volunteering here,” Everett says. “I’m like a tour guide who never leaves the desk.”

Retiring in 1999 after 27 years with the DeKalb County Highway Department, Everett found himself facing the same question that confronts many retirees: What now?

Everett had been an active person his entire working life. When he wasn’t out on the highway, he kept busy with projects around his house and neighborhood. Everett mows lawns during the warmer months, but such seasonal work couldn’t stop him from going “buggy” during the winter. “I’d get bored to death just sitting around,” he says bluntly.

So, when his sisters told him about the Retired & Senior Volunteer Program (RSVP), he immediately looked into it. In addition to volunteering at the museum, Everett also helps give out food for Community Harvest Food Bank’s Auburn distribution center, keeping him involved and active in a community where he has spent nearly his entire adult life.

“You may not think you have the time to contribute, but you do.
And what you get back out of the program is worth every minute.”
— Mary Muzzillo, RSVP volunteer

Mary Muzzillo retired from General Electric after 38 years and joined RSVP to keep busy. She has had a host of volunteer duties—one in particular guaranteed to keep anyone on her toes: tutoring fourth-grade students at J.R. Watson Middle School. She has also participated in a Big Brothers Big Sisters Lunch Buddy program.

Mary says that sometimes getting a youngster to open up and respond can take a while, but building her relationship with her Lunch Buddy is one of the most fulfilling things she’s ever done. “That little spark when you connect is just a great feeling,” she says.

Mary also helps with testing at the Lazy Eye Clinic that RSVP sponsors in cooperation with Prevent Blindness Indiana, and she works in the DeKalb Memorial Hospital gift shop. But ask about her favorite activity, and she’ll probably tell you it’s working on the grounds of the Gene Stratton-Porter State Historic Site with the site’s master gardener.

“Gardening was always a hobby of mine,” Mary says. “I never thought I’d have the chance to learn so much about it. It’s well worth the extra drive.” Volunteering at the historical site also allows her to spend time with one of her grandchildren, who helps out occasionally.

“Sometimes I have to remind myself I’m there to work,
there’s so much chatting going on.”
— Mildred Gaff, RSVP volunteer

Mildred Gaff and her husband moved to Auburn several years ago to be closer to their grandchildren. She thought RSVP would provide an excellent way to make new friends in an unfamiliar town and meet people who share her enthusiasm for sewing. Mildred also had another motivation. For several years, she was ill and incapacitated, unable to work or get around much until special medical treatment allowed her to reclaim her life.

Volunteering is Mildred’s way of making up for lost time. She’s logged nearly 1,200 hours in the past year on various RSVP activities, including those with RSVP’s sewing group, which produces a prodigious number of shawls, bags, turbans, bears, and other items for patients at the DeKalb County Memorial Hospital. An avid quilter, Mildred says her proudest moment came when she was able to help the Quilt Fabric Shop in Fort Wayne donate a quilting frame to RSVP.

Mildred is just one of the approximately 450 volunteers who represent the Auburn chapter of RSVP, a national Senior Corps program sponsored locally by Catholic Charities. Auburn’s RSVP serves DeKalb, Noble, LaGrange, and Steuben counties, and helps people age 55 and older put their skills and experience to work in their communities, serving in schools, hospitals, and more than 80 other nonprofit organizations.

Villa of the Woods

“Even though I enjoy my independence, it’s good to know that if I need anything, the staff
is always here to help me.”
— Dale Foltz, Villa of the Woods resident

Dale Foltz learned about Villa of the Woods back in 1992. He’d been living at home, taking care of his sister Bonnie. When Bonnie passed away, Dale needed a safe, affordable environment. Villa of the Woods proved to be a perfect fit.
 
“Even though I enjoy my independence, it’s good to know that if I need anything, the staff is always here to help me," Dale says.
 
Dale enjoys doing jigsaw puzzles and old movies. If fact, he regularly hosts a movie night. But music is Dale's real passion, something he likes to share with all the friends he's made at Villa of Woods over the years.
 
Dale's pride and joy is his vinyl record collection, which includes close to 6,000 hard-to-find albums and 45-rpm singles. You'll find lots of classic cuts by the likes of legends Nat King Cole, Frank Sinatra, Doris Day, Rosemary Clooney, Dean Martin, and Elvis Presley, but you won't find the one piece of music that Dale has grown to love while volunteering at St. Joseph Hospital.
 
Dale volunteers at the hospital three days a week. Of course, Dale has a special affinity for St. Joseph Hospital—that's where he entered the world in March 1939. “I really enjoy working with the people at the hospital, and I feel like I'm giving something back to the community," Dale says. "What I get a real kick out of is that every time a baby is born, they play Brahms' Lullaby over the public address system, and everybody in the hospital knows there’s a new baby."
 
When Dale retired, he still had some unfinished business—his education. He was still just a kid when his father was severely injured in an industrial accident, and Dale had to quit school and work to help support his family. In 1998, he earned a graduate equivalency diploma.
 
Dale's also a devoted Cubs fan. Give him a moment, and he'll rattle off the starting lineup and pitching rotation for Chicago's '69 September swooners.       

“They treat you right, just like a member of the family. I guess
the best way to say it is that it just ‘feels like home’ here.”
— Nancy Bartlett, Villa of the Woods resident

The staff at Villa of the Woods couldn’t ask for a more glowing endorsement of their facility and services than the one offered Nancy Bartlett, who’s been living at the residential facility for older adults for almost two decades.

“I don’t know where to start—I love everything about this place,” Nancy says. “In general, the place is beautiful. It’s very clean, and it’s very peaceful. And you can’t beat the staff here—they’re topnotch in my book.”

Nancy served as a nurse’s aide at Woodview Nursing Home for 24 years when she became a Woodview patient herself after a back operation. After undergoing physical therapy, she began looking for a living arrangement that better suited her lifestyle. Some good advice pointed her toward the Villa.

“I have a big private room with a full bath, and to my knowledge, this is the only place of its kind in the state where you can be on room-and-board assistance and still have your own room,” Nancy says. “If you have an emergency, you just push a button, and someone will come to help you. The food is good, and all the household chores are done for you. There’s even a bus stop right out in front, so you can go wherever you want.”

Nancy’s a very active volunteer at Wayndale Baptist Church and readily lends a hand to other organizations. And, she still has plenty of time to spend with her 11 grandchildren and 12 great-grandchildren, who all live in the area.